


Character Alignments are a Sign of a Weak Mind

by Hinn_Raven, jbayeux



Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Non-Magical, Alternate Universe - Tabletop Gaming, Cullen is a clueless puppy, Dungeons & Dragons, F/F, Gen, Humor, Loads and Loads of Characters - Freeform, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Twin Inquisitors, oblivious to love
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-12-04
Updated: 2016-01-30
Packaged: 2018-05-04 21:08:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 15,698
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5348543
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Hinn_Raven/pseuds/Hinn_Raven, https://archiveofourown.org/users/jbayeux/pseuds/jbayeux
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Varric Tethras swore he would never GM again, not after the disaster that was his last campaign. But when Vivienne needs to scout two up and coming science students for her academic decathlon team, he finds himself with little choice. Soon, everyone, from the football captain who hates him to the mysteriously helpful first year whose name no one knows, is involved in the game of the century. </p><p>They will be telling stories of this into the next age.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Club Fair

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to this ridiculous AU of ours. 
> 
> So, background. Everyone attends the University of Orlais, but backgrounds are fairly close to canon, unless specified otherwise. 
> 
> Our Inquisitors are Semet and Kaaras Adaar, twins who were homeschooled until a myseterious scholarship sent them out of their familiar life into the chaos of Val Royeux. 
> 
> Main pairings are M!Adaar/Cullen and F!Adaar/Josephine, but there will be background pairings and side pairings that we will update as we come to them. 
> 
> This is mostly just a prologue; most other chapters will be longer. All characters will be introduced eventually, and we really do mean all characters. 
> 
> We hope you all enjoy!

Move-in day was, _big_ , in a way Kaaras had never even thought possible.  During the Open Day tours they had mainly stayed in the main science buildings, and even then he was astounded by the sheer size of everything.  He and Semet were living in a small apartment in downtown Val Royeaux, paid for by some scholarship or other, and once they had made the short walk from their apartment to the main campus they were caught up in the festivities.   _If this was just for the start of the second semester_ , he wondered, _what was fresher’s week like?_  He looked over to Semet, currently being plied with free wristbands and offers for the football team.  She looked moderately panicked, so Kaaras made eye contact and walked over, meeting her halfway.

“It’s-” Semet began hesitantly.

“Big?” Kaaras offered.  Before either could continue, the football representative began to speak to Semet again, and Kaaras felt a tap on his shoulder.  He turned to see--probably for the first time since he arrived in Val Royeaux--someone who was taller than him.  He probably looked shocked, because the guy looked confused for a moment before speaking.

“Whoah, you’re even bigger from the front!”

The marginally smaller guy next to him elbowed him.  Both of them had little room to speak, as built as they were.

“So you’re going to come out for rugby, am I right Boss?” The first guy asked. He was the tallest person Kaaras had ever seen, even taller than his and Semet’s dad. He was broad shouldered and pleasant faced, and he wore an elaborately decorated patch over his right eye. He wore a white muscle shirt underneath a bulky letterman’s jacket, which was open, showing off impressive muscles. The arms of his jacket were covered in patches, but the one that drew Kaaras’ eye was one that looked like the skull of a cow, directly over the left bicep.

“I apologise that he’s terrible at introductions.  I’m Krem, and this is Bull, and we were wondering if you’d be interesting in trying out for the rugby team?  You already look to have the build for it.” Krem was thinner than Bull, but he wore the same letter jacket, with almost as many patches on it, but his was zipped up all the way to his chin, showing that he was slightly more aware of the winter weather than his counterpart. He wore bright orange earmuffs, and had a wide grin. His voice had the faintest trace of a Tevinter accent.

Kaaras… had definitely _heard_ of rugby at some point.  He knew it was a sport, at the very least,

“That’s the thing with the…?”  Kaaras trailed off, unsure what kind of ball was used.

“Quanco!” Bull said cheerfully. “Or rugby ball is fine. So, are we good to put you down?” He pulled a clipboard out of his jacket, grinning widely.

“I...I’ve never really done...sports?  Ever, really.  In any capacity.”  Kaaras admitted.  

Bull laughed. “ _Right_ ,” he said, “And you look like _that_ from _Dungeons and Dragons_ , I’m sure.”

“I mean I exercise, but uhh, yeah, never played any sports.” Kaaras replied.  Krem looked just as puzzled as Bull.  

Then Bull shrugged, “Aw don’t worry about it Boss, it’s simple, you throw the ball, you catch the ball, you knock some people over.  You’ll pick it up quick enough, yeah?”

“Yeah...maybe?” Bull laughed again and clapped him on the shoulder. Krem handed him a slip of paper with a date and time on it, and took his name and number. Kaaras stood there for a while, entirely unsure of what he had just agreed to.  He looked around, panicking for a moment when he couldn’t find Semet, or figure out where _he_ was. He stopped by one of the student guides to ask for directions to the main pavilion.

The kid he asked looked as young as him, wearing a wide-brimmed hat that looked too large on his skinny face, but he gave Kaaras directions in a quiet, calming voice.  Making his way back he caught sight of Semet running walking rather quickly away from the football team representative from before, this time with a flyer clutched tightly in her hands.

“They got you too?” He asked.  Semet nodded, both of them thinking the same thing.

“It can’t go _too_ badly,” Kaaras said, voicing their mutual fear.

* * *

Semet wondered if this was a mistake.

“We should have stayed in the apartment,” she said to her brother, struggling her way through the crowd.

After she had shaken the football recruiter and her brother had shaken the rugby team, they had fled the sports section of the pavilion towards the hopeful safety of academic clubs.

Almost as soon as they reached the academic clubs, Semet and Kaaras were separated. A group of football players, most of them shorter than Semet, pushed through, shouting and laughing. Semet flinched away, and nearly ran into a pimply-faced boy wearing a ridiculous looking carnival mask.

“Hey, watch it!” The boy’s voice was irritating.

“Sorry, I didn’t see you!”

“Ooh, we’ve got a _Marcher_ here!” Suddenly, several more people in similar masks pressed on Semet from all sides. Semet’s eyes went wide. _This_ hadn’t been covered in the books she and Kaaras had read about college. She glanced around wildly, looking for Kaaras. All around her, the boys hooted and whistled, mocking her accent and her height.

“ _Eh-hem_.” Suddenly, the boys stopped talking. There was the click of high heels, and suddenly the crowd parted.

“Oh, _there_ you are, darling!” A polished looking upperclass student appeared in front of them, smiling charmingly. Semet recognized her vaguely from the Chemistry meetup the night before. “I was wondering where you’d gotten to. Come along, I have something I simply _must_ show you.” She took Semet’s arm and guided her out of the crowd, towards a booth.

Once they were a safe distance away from the boys, she dropped Semet’s arm and turned to face her.

“Are you alright, my dear?”

She was shorter than Semet, but that wasn’t really saying much. Semet knew only one person who was taller than her, and that was Dad.

“I’m fine,” she said. “Thank you for that.”

“It was my pleasure, my dear.” She smiled at Semet. “Your name is Adaar, is that correct?”  
“Semet Adaar, that’s right.” She glanced down, trying to catch a glimpse of the girl’s name tag. _Vivienne_ , it read in crisp, readable handwriting.

Everything about Vivienne was well-put together. She wore a crisp looking lavender shirt beneath a white suit jacket with black trim, and a white pencil skirt. On the collar of her shirt silver fleur-de-lys pins gleamed. She wore high heels that looked like something that a business woman would wear instead of a college student, and that were in surprisingly good condition, despite the slush on the ground.

“Well, since we’re here, why don’t you come have a look at what we at the Academic Decathlon booth have to offer.” She glanced at the football pamphlet, and raised an immaculate eyebrow. “Football, my dear?”

“The recruiter was very insistent I had the build for it,” Semet said sheepishly.

“Ah. _Cassandra_.” Vivienne nodded knowingly. She then led Semet to a nearby table, where two boys stood behind it, looking incredibly bored.

Both of them were rather short. The shorter one of them was bald like Vivienne, wearing a green hoodie and a strange sort of pendant that looked suspiciously like a jawbone to Semet, while the other had an immaculately groomed mustache, an undercut, and a neat looking navy button down shirt with the sleeves rolled up, despite the chill. They looked like the most mismatched pair that Semet had ever imagined, and she was twins with Kaaras.

“Solas. Dorian,” Vivienne distracted them from their glaring at each other. “This is Semet Adaar.”

“Pleasure to meet you!” The mustached one said, reaching out a hand. “I’m Dorian Pavus, I’m a sophomore genetics major.”

“Solas,” the one with the weird necklace (that was _definitely_ a jawbone, Semet didn’t know what to make of that) said. He didn’t offer his hand. His eyes briefly glanced at the flier she still was carrying, and his expression shifted slightly. “I’m a senior physics and history major.”

“Semet,” she introduced herself. “I’m a first year. Chemistry and pre-med,” she added.

“How delightful!” Vivienne said. “I’m in Chemistry myself. Along with Political Science and French.”

“Ah, Vivienne,” Dorian said, shaking his head. “Out to outclass us all, as usual.”

“Naturally,” Vivienne smiled briefly, before turning her attention back to Semet. “We could certainly use someone with your abilities for Academic Decathalon, my dear. It’s a wonderful opportunity.”

Kaaras suddenly appeared in her field of vision, running towards her, dodging everyone who was in his path. “Semet!” He called, skidding up to her. In his hands was a bright red scarf. “You won’t believe what just happened to me, these Orlesians are--” he stopped talking, realizing that she was near other people. “Oh. Hello!”

“There you are! Kaaras, this is Vivienne, Solas, and Dorian. This is my brother, Kaaras. He’s studying forensic science and anatomy.”

“How charming!” Vivienne said, smiling. “I was just telling your sister about our club here. We’re the Academic Decathlon; it’s a competition held in the spring every year. It’s a combination of all different subjects, so we try to put together a varied team every year.”

“Mostly of upper years,” Solas added darkly. Semet blinked.

“Oh. Well, then we won’t take up any more of your time. We’ll get going. Thanks again for your help back there,” she added to Vivienne, who had a strange expression on her face, before grabbing Karaas’s arm. “Let’s go home,” she said to him.

“ _Please_.”

* * *

Making their way home was easier said than done, and the helpful boy in the hat wasn’t there to give them directions this time.  While they walked, Semet spoke,

“So, what were you about to tell me?  Also what is with the scarf?”  Kaaras looked down, remembering,

“Oh, right!  So I, uh, may have knocked over a display for one of sororities?  Vena-...Vera, V-something I think.  I pick it up, and apologize, but these three girls just start going at me.” Kaaras paused, making an awkward expression that Semet understood as he said, “you know, stuff about being a Marcher, and _tall_.”

“And?”

“And then out of _nowhere_ , the main girl gets a literal pie to the _face!_ ”  Kaaras said, “I honestly didn’t think that actually happened!  I mean it was in the movies, but definitely not in the books.”

“I know what you mean, the books seem to have missed a _lot_ of stuff about college.  But where did the scarf come from?”

“Well, I didn’t get a good look at who threw the pie, they ran too quickly,”  Kaaras remembered.  

There had been a flash of red as one of the girls, Florianne was her name apparently, grabbed the scarf off of the assailant.  The pie-thrower had wriggled, letting the scarf fall, laughing loud and clear as they disappeared.  The sorority girls had hurried off soon after, leaving the scarf in the slush, so Kaaras gone to pick it up. As he bent down to grab it, someone else did at the same time.  Kaaras’ size worked against him here, and even as he tried to avoid it, knocking heads with the stranger was an inevitability.

“Sorry!  I’m really sorry,”  Kaaras said to the guy, the _really_ good looking guy that was holding one hand up to his head and the scarf in the other.  He was wearing BDUs,  and Kaaras recognized one of the patches from the University’s ROTC.

“It’s...no trouble.  No trouble at all,”  Kaaras sighed internally.  The guy was probably terrified of him.  Unlike Semet, he was aware that the pair of them could be seen as _intimidating_ , and because of that, making friends was that much harder.  Then, the guy smiled, and Kaaras had to admit that it was one of the most beautiful things he had ever seen.  He began to fold the scarf in his hands as he spoke, noting the rugby flyer in his hands.

“I see Krem has another linebacker already lined up for this year.”  Kaaras laughed, unsure if the joke was funny or not.  After what felt like an eternity, the guy pressed the scarf into Kaaras’ hands, feeling the warmth from his hands in the winter air.  The guy laughed nervously one more time, probably because Kaaras had lost ability to speak, before turning and leaving.  Kaaras shook his head to refocus on his story and continued,

“Maybe if I find out who they were, I can give it back!”  Kaaras looked at his sister, hoping if she knew whether or not this was appropriate college behaviour.  She didn’t seem to be listening, actually, she seemed to have stopped a few steps back.

A pretty Antivan girl was standing in front of them. The skirt of her dress was bright gold, and nearly reached the ground, stopping at ankle length to show off the surprisingly practical brown leather boots she was wearing. The bodice of her dress was navy blue, while her sleeves were the same gold as the skirt. Her black hair was piled up on top of her head, and she was turning towards them, smiling warmly.

“Let’s go,” Semet whispered, grabbing his arm tightly.

“What? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing’s wrong, let’s _go_.” Semet was flushing brightly.

“Are we running away because you saw a cute girl? Semet?”  Kaaras asked, as hypocritical as he felt the teasing was.

“ _Shut up_.”

* * *

“Oh no you don’t,” Varric said, “Do you know what happened the last time I ran one of those?  You don’t, but I’ll tell you anyways.  There was  _blood_ , not in character, not figurative,  _literal actual blood_ . My monster manual has a stain from where Anders’ nose bled on it after Marian punched him.  It drove my best friends to fisticuffs and got us all banned from the Hanged Man for the natural term of our  _lives_ .”  Varric looked like he was reliving a genuinely upsetting memory.  

Vivienne sighed, realizing that would require a more delicate touch.

“Be that as it may my dear, we shouldn’t let past, _difficulties_ , prevent us from living fully in our future.  And then, there is your _publication_ , to consider,”  Vivienne said sweetly.

“How do you know about-?” Varric looked mildly shocked.

“Assume I know everything, my dear.  Now, I also know that I _need_ these twins as a part of my scholastic decathlon, and I know that they have barely interacted with _any_ extracurricular activities, since they only have just arrived.  I need them open and _receptive_ , if I am going to get them on board in time.”

“And how does this benefit me?  Aside from the material, I guess.  It seems like a lot of effort for something that is going to inevitably blow up in my face.”  

Vivienne smiled; she knew she had one thing Varric couldn’t resist.

“Arrange a location for me, and I will provide a group.  I will make sure it’s balanced, and, _Cassandra Pentaghast_ will be there,”  Vivienne said.  

Varric laughed, loud and disbelieving. “Ha!  As if!  Listen here _Madame de Fer_ , If you can get the Seekers’ football captain to agree to sit down for five hours and play _Dungeons and Dragons_ , I will run it.”  

Vivienne smiled very wide, pleased.

“Wait, why are you smiling-oh, _shit._ ” Varric said with feeling.  

He felt the breeze from Vivienne’s tailored jacket as she spun on a platform heel and walked away with newfound purpose.

This was not going to end well.


	2. The First Week

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A few notes: Robbie goes to a very big school in the UK for science. I go to a very small school in the US for the humanities. So the system here is essentially a hybrid of the two systems. We apologize in advance for the confusion. 
> 
> Also, we took an extreme break from reality in that we assumed the characters could actually get stuff done in the first D&D session. Do not expect this in real life. It doesn’t happen.

**Chapter Two: First Week of Class**

_Sunday_

“Did you bring them?” Sera asked, looking askance, as if her reputation for anarchy would be undermined if seen in public with Vivienne.  To be fair, Vivienne felt the same way concerning her own reputation for being a functioning member of society.

“I’m surprised that someone who can’t be bothered to wear a clean shirt out in public would care so much about flowers.”

“Heh, shows what you know,”

“Also, do see that neither you nor any of your associates gives themselves _digitalis_ poisoning?  Not that I particularly care, of course.”  Vivienne said, handing her a carefully wrapped bundle of potted foxglove.  It had been, challenging, even for her, to acquire such a quantity in the middle of January, but if it was for the ultimate end of winning the Decathlon, it would be done.

“Of course, _Viv_ , can’t have anyone thinking you're a person or anything like that,” Sera said, giggling at the nickname that she used for the express reason that Vivienne could not tolerate it.

“Here-” Vivienne paused, Sera was whispering something to the flowers, or rather, a bee that had landed on the bundle of flowers.  Odd, as though Orlesian winters were nothing compared to other places, like Ferelden, Vivienne couldn’t see a bee surviving through the winter, without help.  She shook it off, she had far more important things to worry about.

“Here.” She said again, this time thrusting a list in front of Sera’s nose, “These are the people I have selected so far.  Do not make any additions without notifying me-”

“Yeah yeah, I got it your freakin’ _long_ text, after Mythology, the Herald’s Rest, you keep the flowers coming and I’ll make sure that everyone keeps showing up, blah, blah, blah.  Is there anything _important_ , or can I go?” Sera asked.  Vivienne simply sighed, and Sera took it as her cue to leave.

* * *

Sports club practices started up the weekend before class, and one of the building secretaries had been nice enough to tell Vivienne the time and place.  The gym on campus was large enough that both the rugby team and football team could practice there simultaneously, unhindered by one another.  Vivienne saw Bull as she walked in.  Giving the receptionist at the door a smile and an apologetic gesture towards the rugby team, indicating she would just be a moment, he let her pass without paying, or even having a membership for that matter.

She strode up to Bull with purpose, he was on his back bench pressing a frankly absurd amount of weight.  The other Chargers who were nearby working out turned to stare at her, she ignored them, and waited for Bull to finish his set.  When he sat up, she cleared her throat and spoke,

“Bull, darling, I assume by now you’ve received a message from Sera regarding a get-together this Friday?”

“Uh, yeah, how did you-” Bull began to ask.

“I am simply asking to confirm your attendance.” Vivienne interrupted.

“Ah, I don’t know I have a class on Friday afternoon,”

“The message should say that it is after your Mythology class,” Vivienne said.

“How did you-” Bull started.

“ _Bull_ ,” Vivienne said sweetly.

“I mean, absolutely!  I will definitely be there, ma’am,” Bull replied.

“ _Lovely_ darling, see you then,” Vivienne said, “Oh, and please try to have the relevant details prepared and relayed to Mr. Tethras before Friday.  Monsieur Aclassi.”  She nodded at Krem.  Before he could respond, or any of the Chargers could ask questions, Vivienne left in search of the Seeker’s captain.

Cassandra Pentaghast was many things, tall, incredibly strong, possessed of facial bone structure that would inspire jealousy in anyone with less confidence than Vivienne, but there was one thing about Cassandra that Vivienne had to exploit to convince her to come to the game.  While Vivienne was positive that Cassandra wouldn’t say no, the matter did involve some measure of tact, and so she decided to make this connection personally, instead of leaving it to Sera.

Cassandra was in the middle of bench pressing what looked like significantly more weight than Bull had been.  At the end of her set, she caught sight of Vivienne, looking quite out of place, and waved her over, looking slightly confused.

“Can I... help you with anything Vivienne?”  Cassandra asked.

“Yes my dear, I do believe you can,” Vivienne answered.  She waited for a moment, just enough so that Cassandra was about to prompt her so say something more, before speaking, “I am looking to put together a game of _Dungeons and Dragons_ , and I would be ever so grateful if you would join our group.  What do you say?  It would be on Fridays, after your Mythology class.”

“My Mythology class? How did-” Cassandra began.

“That question is growing rather stale, will you be there dear?” she asked.

“I-I’m afraid we were planning on scheduling practices on that evening, I’m sorry-”

Vivienne had heard enough, now was time for the trump card.

“Varric Tethras will be running the game.  If you would send all character information to him?  Here is his personal email.”  Vivienne handed Cassandra the piece of paper with Varric’s address written on it.  She accepted it with an almost kind of reverence.

“ _Varric Tethras_ , as in the author of-” Cassandra began

“The one and only.  He does, of course, go to our school.” Vivienne replied.  A small noise nearly too high pitched to be heard by human ears came from Cassandra, and her face was filled with glee.  She then saw that Vivienne was watching her and she scowled.

“Pretend you don’t know this about me.” She said flatly, glaring.

“Of course, my dear.  This can be our little secret.”  Vivienne said sweetly, turning gracefully and heading back out the way she came.

Sera could manage the rest, now that Varric was bound to run the game by his own words.  

Vivienne wondered if people would ever stop underestimating her.

* * *

Varric groaned after he saw the email on his phone.

_Cassandra Pentaghast_ had just sent him an email with her ideas for a character.

This was actually going to happen.

He got to his feet, groaning. “Hey Curly!”

Cullen Rutherford, his roommate, looked up from his textbook. “What is it, Varric?” He sounded completely exasperated with Varric already. Varric hadn’t even made him _do_ anything yet.

“You know that book I made you store in the ceiling tiles in week one of last semester? I need you to get it down for me.”  
If looks could kill, Varric would be one very short corpse. But Cullen sighed and stood on his bed in order to fetch the book.

“The book” in question was, in fact, the World Bible. In it was every single note and thought that Varric had ever had about his setting, all the old character sheets that Garrett had spilled coffee on, Merrill’s careful sketches of the eluvian, Fenris’s tattoo designs, and all of the dirty things Isabela had scrawled in the margins.

Anders had been the one to give it to him, ironically enough. It had been a present from an old friend of Anders’ that he had put Varric in contact with, once they had all decided they wanted to run a game. The Warden, as Anders had called them, had ran two games in this setting before, but had to stop playing after they joined the military, and had been happy to send Varric their World Bible and to let him play around in their world.

The book was _massive_. It weighed about as much as two poetry anthologies, and had a gigantic red dragon on the cover. The Warden, Varric had learned, as _very_ thorough.

“What _is_ this thing?” Cullen complained, handing it over.

“This, Curly,” Varric said, taking it over to his bed, where his laptop lay open, “Is the key to the future.”

He had emails from Ward N. Blackwall (some guy whose email photo was of a dog?), Josephine Montilyet (the student council representative?), Vivienne Montsimmard (who, apparently, was into D&D as well as scaring people shitless and ruling over academia with an iron fist), and a Facebook message from Leliana Vasseur (who he’d met once back in Kirkwall. She’d played in one of the Warden’s previous campaigns, and had played her old character in a fun battle sequence in the Chantry, given an ominous warning that Varric had written for her, and then watched Fenris and Anders squabble over the glowing D20 for the rest of the night with an amused expression) about possibly bringing back her old character from the previous campaign.

And, of course, Cassandra Pentaghast, who had done nothing but glare at him, grunt at him, and walk away from him since day one of the semester, but who apparently knew D&D well enough to submit a rough character sheet, a list of questions about the setting, a two page backstory for her character, and a quick note asking for input.

Varric had no idea what to make of this, except to be relatively unsurprised that she was playing a dragon-hunting paladin.

“I thought you said you were never playing Dungeons and Dragons again?” Cullen asked, looking up from his textbook as Varric began to dig around in his desk for his dice. “I believe your exact words were ‘Never again. Three years of planning down the drain, all because Anders threw a fit, took an explosive spell feat, and blew up the fucking Chantry’.”

“Look, Curly, I’d like to see _you_ to stare down Vivienne and tell her no.”

“Why does Vivienne want you to run one of your nerd things?” Varric took one look at the math textbook that Cullen was holding, then glanced at the schedule taped to the door. Cullen didn’t have math until Tuesday.

“I don’t know,” Varric sighed. “She wants to convince these twins to join her Academic thing. Or something like that.”

“How does _Dungeons and Dragons_ get them to join Academic Decathlon?” Cullen asked, incredulous. Suddenly he blanched. “Wait. _Twins_?”

“Calm down, Curly, I’m sure these two are nothing like Marian and Garrett. Your virtue will remain intact.”

“That’s not--that’s not what I’m worried about!” Cullen was blushing furiously, doubtlessly remembering the time Garrett showed up at JROTC wearing a military stripper outfit. Or the time that Marian had asked him to prom by writing it on the blackboard and then lying on the teacher’s desk with a rose in her mouth. Or any of the other times, really. The Hawkes had lived to make Cullen blush.

“I’m going to stay as far away from this disaster as possible,” Cullen muttered, sitting down on his bed and hiding behind his math textbook again.

Varric rolled his eyes and began to read through the character sheets, taking notes as he went.

* * *

_Monday_

Physiology was Kaaras’ first class of the day, and he was incredibly excited.  

He had taken the online version of the course over the last semester, and studied proper lecture note taking with Semet to prepare for going to ‘real’ school.  

He strode into the lecture theatre six minutes before the lecture was tabled to start, finding it empty except for a couple people, three scattered towards the back, and one in the third row, center.  The student up front must have had the right idea, the acoustics would be terrible where the others were sitting, so Kaaras walked towards the front of the hall and took a seat in the same row, a few seats down, enough so that he could move two spaces in either direction and still have a buffer zone between him and the... _guy_.

It was the same guy from the club fair, Kaaras was pretty sure, despite the fact that he could barely remember anything about what the guy from the club fair looked like beyond _gorgeous_.  In any case, this guy merited gorgeous in his own right, and Kaaras began noticing details about him that had slipped his mind.

The golden hair that started to curl but was kept just barely within military regulation.  A scar over his upper lip, light brown eyes that...were looking right at him.  He was staring at the guy, Kaaras realized belatedly, which was definitely something the books had warned against.  What was worse, the guy had definitely noticed him staring, and it had definitely been longer than the maximum three seconds to begin polite conversation with a classmate, so this know qualified as _creepy_ staring.   _An excellent start to the year_ , he groaned internally, but at the same time, the guy spoke,

“You...You were at the club fair, right?” he asked, and then added, “You aren’t wearing your scarf.”  He looked mildly put out by that, for a reason Kaaras couldn’t begin to figure out.

“Ah, it isn’t actually mine?” Kaaras admitted sheepishly.  The guy looked shocked, or playful?

“Are you telling me I’m an accomplice to your scarf thievery?” he asked.

“I mean, you practically shoved it into my hands, this is practically entrapment,” Kaaras responded.

“ _After_ you head-butted me!  I was fearing for my life!” The guy shot back, laughing.

“I’m trying to find out whose scarf it is, so I can give it back,” Kaaras admitted.

“That sounds...” the guy trailed off.

“Sounds like what?” Kaaras asked.

“Like you read the scenario out of a movie script honestly.” He answered.  Kaaras didn’t mention that he knew exactly which movie he was talking about. The thought hadn’t crossed his mind, but in retrospect it did seem kind of ridiculous.  The campus was massive, with more than fifty thousand students, finding _one_ of them not remembering anything about them beyond a penchant for banana cream pies probably slimmed his already meager odds some.  Fortunately, the guy had moved topics,

“What are you doing here so early?” he asked.  Kaaras didn’t really understand the question, you had to be in class at least five minutes before it started, how else did you set your pre-reading notes in order and pull up the slides for the lecture?  Instead, he just said,

“If you're not five minutes early-”

“You're five minutes late.” The guy finished for him, “You're in ROTC too?” he asked.

“What?  No, that’s just something my dad always used to say.”

“Oh, was he in the military?”

“Yeah, for a while,” Kaaras answered.  He then turned back to his printed slides, starting to highlight more complex concepts.

“I’m Cullen by the way.” The guy said a few moments later.  Kaaras turned to look at him, he was smiling slightly, and wasn’t _that_ distracting.  He kind of looked like the sun, Kaaras thought absentmindedly.  Kaaras smiled back, perhaps too broadly, still not having mastered the ‘smirk’ as described in so many of the books he and Semet read.

“I’m Kaaras,” he replied to Cullen and returned to his notes.

The professor came in soon after and began to lecture.  It was, _different_ , to say the least.  

In the Free Marches, the home school group he and Semet had attended had exactly seven people in it.  The lecture hall he was currently in could seat two hundred easily, and it did.  Students didn’t ask questions, as Kaaras found out, to his great mortification, and he was told to bring questions to the professor after the lecture.  It didn’t help that he could feel Cullen watching him, periodically, throughout the lecture.  It helped even less that when Kaaras snuck a glance at him, Cullen always seemed to catch him doing so.  By the end, he was so flustered that he nearly ran out of the hall, forgetting to ask the professor his questions from before.

* * *

Cullen was somewhat glad that he skipped lunch.  He would have hated for his first anatomy practical of the year to be marred by learning that he had a weak stomach.  Not to mention that since the morning lecture, he had felt, different, a pit of nerves in his stomach that wasn’t just the usual anxiety.  

Kaaras, like when he had head-butted Cullen the first time, had managed to turn his day on its ear.

It wasn’t like Cullen didn’t know he was attractive, four years of high school with the Hawke twins had assured him of that fact.  Between them and the steady stream of admirers during first semester, Cullen had spent most of his time running _away_ from people that wanted to talk to him, until today.  

Kaaras was, _big_ , it was probably the only way to describe it.  He took up a lot of space, and a lot of Cullen’s field of vision, he could hardly be blamed if his gaze lingered, occasionally.  It may have been more like seventy-eight percent of the time, but he doubted anyone but him was counting.  And _yet_ , Kaaras seemed to have none of the trouble he was having when it came to focusing on the lecture.  Did he say something wrong?  Did Kaaras just find him uninteresting?  It was also entirely possible that Kaaras thought he was just plain weird, having been caught staring at him nine times throughout the lecture, ten if you counted the time where he was caught twice in the same look.  He wasn’t entirely sure _why_ it was suddenly so important to extensively categorize Kaaras’ features, or that Kaaras want to talk to him.  Maybe it was because he had trouble believing that anyone built like _that_ wasn’t in ROTC, he wanted to know the guy’s fitness plan.  That seemed as probable as any of the other reasons, Cullen thought, he just had to repeat it to himself until it felt like the _only_ reason.

He made his way into the medical building, handing over his student card and signed code of conduct forms to the receptionist.  She looked them over, checking his name off of a list before handing his card back, along with a lab coat.  
“This is a onetime rental, buy your own for next week,” she said tersely, not looking up from her computer screen.

“Yes ma’am,” Cullen replied, though it was evident the conversation had already ended.  After stashing his stuff in a locker he joined the crowd of students in lab coats outside the main anatomy laboratory.  At six minutes before the scheduled start of the practical, Cullen saw him, or rather _them_.  It was almost impossible _not_ to seem them, Kaaras and his friend were a head or so taller than everyone else in the waiting area.  

 _Shit,_ Cullen thought, _this class a write-off too I guess_.  He idly wondered about what percentage of classes he could sacrifice to staring at Kaaras without being dropped at ROTC.

“Greetings students!  Welcome to Introductory Anatomy, here you will learn all there is to know about the living body.  This knowledge is a gift to you given by the honored dead!  I am Vestalus Pentaghast, I will be your guide on this journey into the _underworld_.”  The professor spoke in a theatrical voice, loud enough that the dead themselves could probably hear him.  

Cullen chanced a look at Kaaras; he looked just as bewildered as the rest of the class at the professor’s demeanor.  This time, it was Kaaras’s companion that noticed Cullen’s stare, and he looked away even more quickly.

They were led into a large room with fifty or so tables, enough for three or four students each.  On each was a body, covered in a turquoise plastic shroud,  Professor Pentaghast moved to the center of the room, his coat trailing him more like a robe, and began directing people into groups.  Now, Cullen knew, given the number of people, the size of the groups, and how the professor was dividing them, the chance of him being put in the same group was, slim.  Or it would have been if he had stayed put.  As it so happened, with a few steps to the left, and a subtle shuffle backwards, the professor assigned him to a table along with Kaaras and…, he really needed to figure out who the other girl was too, for fitness purposes of course, she looked just as built as Kaaras.  As they gathered around the shrouded body, Cullen gave a smile and a small friendly wave.

“Hey again,” he said congenially.  Kaaras replied in kind, but then turned his attention immediately back to the professor, who was giving directions.  Cullen’s mood sank a little.  What _was_ he doing wrong?

* * *

_Tuesday_

Semet walked into accounting, nervous. Her other classes that she’d had so far, she was fine with. They were science; she knew what to do with science. This was... something else. What did accounting count as? A humanities? A social science? She couldn’t remember.

She nearly tripped over a short redhead on her way into class. “I’m so sorry!” She yelped, barely keeping her balance. Luckily, the short boy was sturdy, and hadn’t fallen over either.

He laughed. “Easy there! No harm done!” He grinned at her widely. “But you might want to look down more. There are a lot more people my height around here than yours!”

Semet was a terrible judge of height, but she was pretty sure it wasn’t just compared to her that he was short. He had bright red hair, and wore a brown leather jacket over a red V-neck shirt that showed a remarkable amount of chest hair and a gold medallion. His grin was casual and easy, and he wore a messenger bag thrown over one shoulder that seemed to be overflowing with notebooks and pens.

Semet flushed. “I’ve noticed.”

He laughed again, grinning at her. “Varric Tethras, at your service.” He gave a dramatic bow. Semet couldn’t help but smile. He had a natural charisma that put her at ease, calming her rattled nerves.

“I’m Semet,” she said, clutching her textbook to her chest.

“Pleasure to meet you,” he grinned. “Now, come on, let’s go inside before all the good seats are taken.”

The lecture hall was fairly small, especially compared to the ones she had been in for her earlier lectures.

Varric was talking constantly, spinning stories about how many times people had tripped over him, or simply not noticed him due to his height, and Semet didn’t notice where he was leading her until she’d already sat down.

“Hello, Lady Montilyet,” Varric said grandly. “May I introduce Her Worshipfulness, Semet--sorry, I just realized I never caught your last name.”

“Adaar,” Semet said, laughing at the ridiculous title. Something about Varric put her at ease. Normally, she wouldn’t be this exuberant with someone she’d only just met.  “Nice to meet you.” She turned, and nearly yelped as she realized that this “Lady Montilyet” was the pretty girl from the activities fair.

Her hair was in a braid today, and she wore a ruffled black blouse and a simple blue skirt, a stark contrast to the bright gold and blue outfit from the fair. She wore gigantic gold hoop earrings that bounced and hit her face whenever she moved her head, and there were slight ink marks on her face from where she’d tapped it with her pen. But it was unmistakably her.

“Wonderful to meet you,” her accent was Antivan, and her smile was bright. Semet was tongue-tied. “I’m Josephine Montilyet.”

“I’m--Varric already told you my name,” she said, flushing again.

“Semet,” Josephine said thoughtfully. “Is that... Qunlat?”

Semet blinked, shocked. “Um. Yes.”

“How fascinating! I’m studying international relations, and we’re starting our unit on the Qunari Islands--”

“Easy there, Ruffles,” Varric interrupted, grinning. “You’ll scare the poor girl off.”

It was Josephine’s turn to blush. “Oh. Right. Of course. Are you a business major? Or perhaps, accounting?”

“No, I’m chemistry and pre-med.”

“Chemistry, huh?” Varric said, raising an eyebrow. “Are you acquainted with Vivienne? Or, perhaps, Sera?”

“I met Vivienne at the activities fair!” Semet said.

“Oh?” Josephine asked. “Did she try to get you to join her Academic Decathlon? I know she’s always looking for science members.”

Semet shrugged. “From what, Solas, I think that was his name, said, they’re looking for upperclassmen, not transfer freshmen like my brother and I.”

“You have a brother?” Varric asked, squinting slightly.

“A twin,” Semet said. “His name Kaaras.”

Varric looked slightly exasperated. “ _And_ suddenly everything makes sense.” Semet frowned at him, confused. “Never mind. I’ll tell you sometime later.”  

“Varric, that reminds me. Did you get my email?” Josephine seemed very excited, and Semet, realizing the conversation was between the two of them, began to hunt through her bag for her notebook and pen. She had no idea what to expect from the social sciences, so it was best to be prepared.

“Yes, and are you _sure_ you want to do that? Seems like it might be difficult to pull off.”

Josephine smiled brightly, and Semet couldn’t help but stare for a moment. “I’m sure! This should be fun!”

Semet quickly turned her attention to the just-arrived professor, and tried not to stare at Josephine out of the corner of her eye through the whole class.

She failed miserably.

* * *

Dorian was used to being the first in class. The lecture hall that the Forensics professors were allotted was impossible to find and honestly, who showed up to class a full ten minutes early?  Except for him, but that was merely to get away from his somewhat  _less than ideal_ living situation.  Also the kid from the club fair, Kaaras, apparently.

“Now this is just unfair,” he said to the empty room, Kaaras whirled around, looking guilty.  Dorian felt sorry for the kid, and as weird as if felt to call a person that large a kid, he was a first year, and Dorian was a second dammit, he was going to call him a kid until he got squashed by an errant thumb.

“Ah don’t worry, you didn’t do anything wrong.  I’m just hoping you understand that a first year, a second semester _transfer_ no less, being able to find this lecture hall without too much trouble is grossly unfair.  And you have the _audacity_ to show up ten minutes early.” Dorian shook his head while laughing.

“You're, Dorian, right?  You were at the club fair with Vivienne and that guy, Solas, was it?”  Kaaras said.

“Kaaras, if you wish to be on friendly terms with me in any capacity, please never mention myself or Vivienne in the context of being ‘ _with_ ’ Solas in any way shape or form, yes?” Dorian said severely.  Kaaras gulped, and nodded in agreement.  Dorian took a seat next to him and unpacked his laptop.  Kaaras had an honest to god _notebook,_ like he was still living in the last Age, and there were highlighters and a textbook taking up even more space than Dorian himself occupied, which was no mean feat.  It did mean, however, that nearly no one else would sit in this row, which was reason enough to stay where he was.  Dorian could get used to a private row, and Kaaras seemed congenial enough.

“I thought you were a Genetics student, a _second year_ Genetics student?” Kaaras asked after a brief silence.

“Indeed I am, I merely have made some revisions to my major in recent months, and so I must take the relevant prerequisites to catch up,” Dorian replied, tone slightly short, not wishing to get into the unpleasant details of _why_ and _how_ , and _what did his parents think of that_.  Fortunately Kaaras took the answer at face value and went back to his books.

As the rest of the students began to arrive, and the professor began to speak, Dorian was at first slightly put off by Kaaras’ immediate and absolute disinterest in further conversation.  He hadn’t been _that_ sharp with him, had he?  That was before he noticed that the kid was taking notes.   _Really_ taking notes.  Everything the lecturer was saying, _plus_ what was on the slide, _plus_ accurate little diagrams wherever it was appropriate.  Who _was_ this kid?  Dorian suddenly understood the thrashing Vivienne had given Solas during the club fair for scaring him and his twin off.  

She _knew_ about these kids somehow, and Dorian suspected Kaaras’ sister was much the same. He really shouldn’t be surprised; she was Vivienne and she really _did_ know everything.  That also explained the email regarding a certain request to attend a gathering on Friday.  

He resolved to make room in his schedule.

* * *

_Wednesday_

Josephine had stayed up far too late on Tuesday night. Student Council had been hectic. It was only their second meeting of the semester, but already Cullen and Leliana were arguing about appropriations of funds, which was pointless, since the budget wasn’t due for another four weeks.

Just because Josephine _wanted_ to be a diplomat after graduation did _not_ mean she enjoyed having to mediate every single fight. Which she made a point of reminding Leliana of later that night when they went back to their dorm.

Her alarm went off early, and Josephine groaned blearily as she remembered that she had to take a science class this semester.

 _Chemistry_.

If Josephine ever met whoever had mandated natural science as a part of the general education program, she would stab them with her pen. Or bludgeon them to death with the ridiculously expensive and heavy chemistry textbook that they had been assigned.

She poured herself a cup of coffee and then went through her morning checklist twice to make sure she hadn’t forgotten anything. As it was, she was probably going to have to submit herself to the humiliating process of getting tutoring through the Education Center. She’d rather keep her dignity for as long as possible.

She glanced at herself in the mirror, making sure that her braid was pinned properly, and then left for the Drakon Science Building.

She was ten minutes early; written into her schedule, to give herself breathing space and time to set up.

She was pleasantly surprised to see the girl from yesterday--Semet, that had been her name--seated in the front row, unpacking her backpack.

“Hello!” Josephine greeted her with a smile. Semet started, clearly surprised. Her eyes went wide.

“Oh! Hi!”

Josephine gestured to the empty seat next to her. “Do you mind if I join you? I do prefer sitting in the front.”

“Of course not! Go ahead!” Semet scooted further down, allowing Josephine to sit beside her, with plenty of room between them. Josephine smiled gratefully.

“I’m surprised to see you in this class,” Semet said. She looked rather flushed; perhaps she was too warm?

“Alas, the gen ed requirements force me to expand my horizons,” Josephine said with a sigh. “Although I suppose this is exactly where I should expect to find _you_. Chemistry, right?”

Semet nodded, fiddling with her notebook. “And, uh, you’re?”

“Political Science with a focus in International Relations, Spanish, and Business. Triple major,” she added when she saw Semet’s incredulous look.

“How do you even have time to sleep?” Semet blurted out.

“I _do_ have a course overload,” Josephine said ruefully. “Ah well. Such is the price we pay for education!”

Semet smiled at the joke. “I’m sorry, but... your accent?”

“I’m from Antiva,” Josephine said, used to the question. “Which is _much_ warmer than Orlais,” she added with a small laugh, taking a sip from her coffee.

“I’m from the Free Marches,” Semet said, smiling shyly. “It’s warmer there too, but not by much.” She frowned slightly, looking at Josephine. “Are you cold?” She asked, concerned.

“Only a little, really it’s nothing,” Josephine began to say, but Semet had picked up a large, thick navy blue scarf and offered it to her.

“Here, I don’t mind.”

Josephine accepted the scarf, wrapping it around her neck. It was soft and lovely, and she thanked Semet profusely.

Just then, other students began to trickle in.

“My dear Semet!” Vivienne swooped down to the front row, smiling widely. “How wonderful to see you again!”

“Hello Vivienne!” Semet turned her face to Vivienne. “How are you?”

“I’m wonderful, darling, thank you for asking. Do you mind if I join you?”

“Not at all.” Semet twisted to look at Josephine. “Do you-?”

“Of course not!” Semet moved again, this time closer to Josephine, so that Vivienne could sit. Semet’s leg brushed against hers for a moment.

“Josephine, a pleasure as always,” Vivienne said, inclining her head regally.

“Vivienne,” Josephine smiled. “Always a pleasure.””

“Did you get my email?”

Josephine frowned. Vivienne had already gotten her response, so why would she...

Vivienne pointedly flicked her eyes towards Semet, who was flipping through her textbook.

 _Oh_. Semet must be one of the two science students that Vivienne wanted to recruit for Academic Decathlon through the role playing game. Josephine smiled.

“Yes I did! It sounds like it will be a great deal of fun!”

“Well, if you know anyone else who might be interested, or just want to bring a guest, please feel free,” Vivienne said pointedly.

Semet, however, seemed not to notice, having already started taking notes as the professor set up the power point.

* * *

_Thursday_

“And _how_ do you know this, exactly, Chief?” Krem asked suspiciously as they made their way across campus.

“Come _on_ , Krem! A man’s got to have his secrets.”

“ _Chief_.”

“Might have snuck a peek at his schedule when we were trying to recruit him,” Bull said cheerfully.

Krem groaned. “You’re a sneaky bastard.”

“Comes with the territory!”

Krem sighed. “If you scare off our potential prop, Chief--”

“I won’t ‘scare him off’, Krem! I know what I’m doing!”

“That’s what you said before you tried to recruit Pentaghast, Chief. Now she’s captain of the football team.”

“How was I supposed to know that Skinner would--” Bull was cut off as they approached the Drakon Science Center.

“Boss!” Bull called cheerfully. Kaaras was easily spotted in a crowd; few Orlesians stood nearly as tall as he did.

Krem raised an eyebrow in surprise as he recognized the person next to him. “And, if it isn’t old Rutherford himself! Out and about for once, hey Cullen?”

“Krem,” Cullen said, nodding his head.

“So Boss!” Bull clapped him on the shoulder. “What do you say about grabbing lunch with Krem and me before Criminology?”

“How did--” Kaaras’s questioning was cut off by Bull sweeping them all towards the dining hall.

“So, how are you liking the U of O so far?” Krem asked. If Kaaras was going to be a Charger, it was important to get to know him.  

“It’s... big?”

Krem laughed. “That it is. Where’d you transfer from? Kirkwall? Starkhaven?” Kaaras’s accent was Marcher and he didn’t have the typical Ferelden oh-Maker-why-am-I-here air.

“I, ah, I was homeschooled.” Kaaras seemed self-conscious about it, so Krem decided to leave that be.

“That’s great! Dalish, that’s our other winger, my partner, she was homeschooled too. Sharp as a knife, and reliable on the field.”

Bull and Kaaras both packed away a gigantic lunch. Cullen seemed oddly distracted throughout the whole thing, only barely responding to Krem’s questions about how his classes were going.

They got up and started heading for the Dales Academic Building, Bull cheerfully warning Kaaras about Professor Marjolaine, who was one of the most vicious graders on campus.

“So Cullen, what class do you have here?” Krem asked, frowning as he tried to make sense of Cullen’s strangely quiet behavior.

Cullen started. “Orlesian history.”

Krem frowned. “Isn’t that in Ameridan Hall? The other way?”

Cullen froze. “Right. Of course. See you later!” He then turned on his heel and ran in the opposite direction.

Krem squinted, and then glanced back at Kaaras.

He and Bull made eye contact.

Krem barely managed to stop himself from giggling.

Cullen had a _crush_.

* * *

_Friday_

Kaaras had Criminology Friday mornings, which meant that Semet was alone in the apartment all morning.

First, she did her exercise session and showered, following it up with whole wheat toast and a smoothie for breakfast.

Then she sat down at the kitchen table and did her chemistry homework, and then when she finished, she began work on the anatomy project that was due next month.

After she made herself a sandwich, she headed over to the university, ready for her only (but very long) class of the day.

Mythology was in Skyhold, which was a really old building that strongly resembled a castle.

“Semet, darling!” Vivienne was waiting for her outside, smiling widely.

“Vivienne,” she said, craning her neck to look for Kaaras.

He was talking to Cullen (Semet couldn’t help but roll her eyes. Her brother was incredibly obvious) by the entrance, and Vivienne followed her gaze.

“Actually, my dear, I have an invitation for you and your brother. A colleague of mine, Varric Tethras, is organizing a game of Dungeons and Dragons this evening, and I’m afraid we’re two short. Would you and Kaaras care to join us?”

Semet couldn’t help but stand up a bit straighter, excited. “Dungeons and Dragons? Really? We’d love to!”

She and Kaaras had been playing D&D since they were kids. It had been a favorite way to spend family game night with Dad and Pater. She hadn’t realized that it was a thing that people on campus did as well.

“I didn’t know there was a club for this!” She said to Vivienne as they filed into the room.

“It’s not a club, per se, it’s more of a casual get together,” Vivienne said. “We look forward to having you join us tonight.”

Semet blinked as they entered the lecture hall. She recognized quite a few of the people there.

Cassandra Pentaghast, the football captain, was sitting next to a red haired woman who Semet didn’t recognize. On the woman’s other side was Josephine, who waved when she spotted Semet walking in, indicating that she should join her. Semet bid Vivienne farewell and sat down in the second row next to Josephine.

“How are you doing?” Josephine said briskly.

“I’m doing well,” Semet said cautiously. Josephine looked gorgeous in a knee-length black skirt and tall brown boots, with a sky blue button-up shirt. Today her earrings were gold boats, and her braid was pinned up, giving Semet an unobstructed view. Semet did her best not to stare as she tried to get her books in order.

“Semet!” Kaaras sat on her other side, Cullen sitting next to him. “How was your morning?”

“It was good! I got started on the project.”

“Oh great!”

Semet turned back to Josephine. “Josephine, this is my twin brother, Kaaras.” Eyes widening as she remembered, she looked at Kaaras. “Oh, and Vivienne invited us to play D&D with her tonight!”

“We start after class, my dear,” Vivienne said, having sat right in front of them. Dorian sat next to her, looking as polished as he’d been at the fair. Further down the row sat Varric and Solas, who seemed to be wearing the exact same hoodie as he’d worn at the fair. “I look forward to it.”

“Wait, _you’re_ the twins?” Cullen sputtered.

“Chargers!” Semet winced as a gigantic man literally ran into the room, carrying a boy even smaller than Varric on his shoulders. He was followed by what seemed to be a virtual herd of people, all wearing letter jackets and making a lot of noise.

She recognized two of them from Kaaras’s description as being Bull and Krem. Krem sat down right behind her, while Bull sat down behind Kaaras. The rest of the rugby players (who else could they be?) poured into the seats, filling the entire row.  

“Get down from there, Rocky!” A woman with elaborate facial tattoos shouted.

“You’re just mad I’m tall, Dalish!” But the small man clambered down from Bull’s shoulders anyway, laughing and shouting along with the others.

“Those are the Chargers, the school’s rugby team,” Josephine said quietly to Semet, leaning against her arm in order to be heard over the chaos. “They’re _very_ good.”

“We better be!” Krem laughed. “Think the Chief might die of embarrassment if we lost a game.”

“Ah-hem!” The professor had arrived. “If I can have your attention, please?”

Semet turned the entirety of her attention towards the professor.

She could learn more about the rugby team later.

* * *

Criminology was  _interesting_ to say the least.  That it was taught by a professor that belonged to the College of Arts only served to make it more so.  A Friday morning class that started with hard hitting questions about ethics, and the causes of criminality was an invigorating beginning to the weekend, or at least Kaaras thought so.  The majority of the other students seemed to be restless, for a reason Kaaras couldn’t place.  He was waved over to sit next to Bull and Krem. He was glad that they were being friendly, he hoped it wouldn’t change after rugby tryouts.  

Bull was surprisingly active in class, coming up with answers to questions that neither he nor the professor had thought to ask.  Professor Marjolaine was distinctly unimpressed, and possibly irritated, by that.  Kaaras was becoming familiar with the expression on her face, the one where the professor didn’t expect someone as large as him or Bull to have anything of value to contribute in class.  

It hadn’t been like that back home, where his tutor had been one of Dad’s friends, and everyone had been around the same height.  Part of university life, Kaaras concluded, but seeing the look of frustration on the professor’s face when he and Bull were the only two to raise their hands when a question was posed for the third time in a row made it worth it.

After class let out, Kaaras was eager to check in with Semet. He hadn’t seen her all morning, since he’d left before she’d woken up, and Mythology was one of the classes they shared.  On the way, he pulled the red scarf from the club fair over his head, if the owner saw it, he would be able to properly thank them.  As they were heading towards the Skyhold Building, Cullen jogged up to join them,

“Hey!  You're enjoying your ill-gotten gains then?” He asked, his tone teasing.  Kaaras was glad that the red of the scarf offset his reddening complexion,

“I just figured if the owner is going to find it, then it should be visible.”  Kaaras said.

“Mmm, likely story.” Cullen replied, smiling broadly.  Kaaras realized he was staring again, but fortunately it was interrupted by Krem asking,

“You sure you're heading to the right building this time Cullen?” Cullen grumbled a response, but didn’t head off running, so Kaaras assumed he was in fact going to the same class this time.

Once inside, Kaaras saw Semet sitting next to a girl, the _same_ girl from the club fair in fact, and she wasn’t shaking or running away, which meant progress.

“Semet!” Kaaras sat on her other side, Cullen following him without saying anything. “How was your morning?”

“It was good! I got started on the project.” She grinned at him.

“Oh great!” He’d have to start that tonight.

Semet then turned away from him saying to the girl, “Josephine, this is my twin brother, Kaaras.” She then looked incredibly excited, “Oh, and Vivienne invited us to play D&D with her tonight!”

“We start after class, my dear,” Vivienne said, seated right in the row in the very front. Dorian sat next to her, nodding a greeting to Kaaras when he spotted him. “I look forward to it.”

“Wait, _you’re_ the twins?” Cullen sputtered.  He looked vaguely horrified, and Kaaras was unsure what was wrong.  Before he could find out any more, Bull entered the room, and the entire row behind them erupted into noise.   _The Chargers_ , Kaaras surmised.

“Hey, you!” someone from a row farther back called out, and Kaaras turned to look.  It was a girl with a messy bob cut wearing a dirty plaid shirt.  “That’s my scarf you got there!”  Kaaras scrambled to stand.  Trying to hand her the scarf through the line of boisterous rugby players was a challenge.

“I’m so sorry, I couldn’t find you after the club fair, so I figured if I wore it the owner would find me,” Kaaras said.

“It’s all good yeah?  Serves those pricks right.  Did you wash this?  Because I distinctly remember it falling in the slush last time I saw it.”  The girl asked.

“Yeah, uh, I did.  I just wanted to say thanks, to whoever, helped me out, and that’s you so, thanks.”  Kaaras said.

“No worries, I’m Sera, I’ll see you after yeah?” Sera said.  Kaaras nodded not sure when or where they would speak again, but still grateful to her for saving him from those sorority girls.

The Chargers had just managed to calm down when the professor began to speak.

“Ah-hem!” The professor said, with a thick Orlesian accent, “If I can have your attention, please?”

At the sound, Kaaras immediately put aside any other errant thoughts to focus entirely on the lesson.

* * *

_You walk into the cave. It is dark._

**_-I cast glow on a rock._ **

_Alright. Nimueh casts glow, and the rock starts glowing with an eerie green light. The cave is tall, and stalactites and stalactites hang everywhere. It goes further than you can see._

**_-I roll search._ **

_Allegra begins to look around, searching for something. You notice an indent in the wall of the cave, in the shape of a handprint._

**_-I press it._ **

_Allegra presses the wall and it folds back, revealing a hidden chamber. Inside, you see an altar with a strange orb on it. Surrounding it are fifteen-feet tall statues of elves carved out of marble and dressed in gold and silver._

**_-Are their eyes jewels or something?_ **

_Yes._

**_-I climb up and steal them._ **

_Fine. Roll climb._

**_-Fuck_ ** _._

_You fail to climb the statue._

**_-I’ll climb up._ **

_Okay... Cole, that’s your character’s name, right? Role climb._

**_-I got a twenty._ **

_Well, shit. Alright. You climb the statue closest to you. What do you do now?_

**_-I try to steal the eyes for Sera._ **

_Red Jenny, kid. Red Jenny._ _Alright. Roll... let’s say that’s a strength check._

**_-Seventeen._ **

_Seriously? Alright, you pry out the emerald eyes of the statue of the Evanuris._

**_-I give them to Sera._ **

**_-What? Seriously?_ **

_What’s your alignment, kid?_

**_-It says CG._ **

_Chaotic Good, huh? Guess that works. Alright. Now while the rogues are climbing statues, what are the rest of you doing?_

**_-I search for something to fight!_ **

_Hissrad pulls out his two-handed axe and charges forward. Sensing your hostility, gigantic spiders fall from the ceiling._

**_-What the hell?_ **

**_-I shoot them with arrows!_ **

**_-I cast fireball!_ **

_Roll initiative, guys!_

**_-What does a one mean?_ **

_Alright guys, Stanton trips over his own feet out of sheer terror of the giant spiders, and is out for this round._

**_-This game is ridiculous!_ **

_You wanted to play, Curly. Anyways. Leliana, you won initiative, you go first._

**_-I disappear into the shadows and unleash a sneak attack._ **

_Aaand you got. Of course. Roll damage._

**_-That is a lot of dice for one hit._ **

**_-I did sixteen damage._ **

_Andraste’s breath, fine. Which spider do you want to kill?_

**_-The one closest to Cherette._ **

_Alright. Nightingale disappears into the shadows, not that any of you have high enough perception to notice. Suddenly, an arrow flies out of the darkness and cleaves the spider nearest to Ruffles in two. He’s dead now. Rest in pieces, spider who never got to kill any PCs. Semet?_

**_-I withhold action._ **

**_-What? Why?_ **

_Let her be, Seeker. Okay, time for the other twin. What do you want to do, Kaaras?_

**_-Getafix grabs one of Stanton’s arrows, throws it up and casts Barrage._ **

**_-And then Nimueh casts Maximize._ **

_You little shits. Roll._

_Getafix throws an arrow into the air, and then blasts it with a magical force. Nimueh does the same, and suddenly there are twenty arrows falling from the sky onto the spiders, impaling them._

_Roll damage._

* * *

 

“That’s cheating!” Bull complained, and with that, the game was shattered.

“No it’s not!” Kaaras said, offended.

“It’s combat synergy!” Semet added.

“It’s what happens when you play with twins, trust me,” Varric said. “I should have expected this. I thought homeschoolers would be innocent.”

The twins shrugged in unison.

“You two literally rolled up your character sheets half an hour ago.” This was a large, older student with an impressive beard who had introduced himself as Blackwall. “How do you have the spells memorized already?”

“We memorized the spell list at age fourteen,” Kaaras said. “Made things easier.”

“Pfff? Seriously?” The tiny blonde named Sera said, eyes wide with delight. “That’s great! Hilarious, that is. You two are serious nerds, aren’t you?”  

“You two are _very_ good at this,” Josephine said, smiling widely. “Now, which dice do I use to attack again?”

Semet reached over and picked up the gold D20, handing it to Josephine. “This one,” she said.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> D&D Characters, in order of appearance:  
> Semet: Nimueh, a Neutral Good Tiefling Wizard  
> Cassandra: Allegra Portia, a Lawful Good Human Paladin  
> Sera: Red Jenny/Jenny Scarlet, a Chaotic Good Half-Elf Rogue  
> Cole: Cole, a Chaotic Good Halfling  
> Bull: Hissrad, a Chaotic Neutral Tiefling  
> Cullen: Stanton Zimmerman, a Lawful Neutral Human Ranger  
> Leliana: Lady Nightingale, a True Neutral Human Bard (Cherrette is Josephine)  
> Kaaras: Getafix, a Chaotic Neutral Tiefling Druid
> 
> Other characters will be revealled as they appear! 
> 
> Coming up next: various conversations people have over meals.


	3. Lunch Days

_Monday_

It had happened again.

If you counted the time where he inadvertently walked all the way to the Criminology building, it made it _three_ times that Cullen had ended up somewhere he definitely did not intend to be while talking to Kaaras.

Three instances were technically enough to infer the presence of a pattern, and it worried Cullen, especially because the pattern pointed to him being dragged along to another _Dungeons and Dragons_ game this Friday.

He had been around, or near enough, to know the absolute chaos that had come from Varric’s last game, and though Varric himself may have abandoned sense and decided to run another game, Cullen was going to stand well clear of the fallout of this inevitable shitstorm. At least, that had been the plan.

Cullen had no idea why or how, but after Mythology on Friday, he had left the building with the intention of getting something to eat, at first content to follow along with the group that had gathered at the door, led by Varric and Vivienne to the Herald’s Rest. Part of the way there, the talk of the game had started, mainly Varric asking if everyone had made their characters. Cullen took the opportunity to make an exit, or he tried to, and then…

“Oh come on Cullen, just give it a try, it really is a lot of fun!” Kaaras had said.

After that, there was a significant portion of Cullen’s memory that featured Kaaras’ eyes, and the way the cold air brought color to his cheeks, and then it resumed with Varric handing him a character sheet with a morbid chuckle.

The third time happened after their shared physiology lecture the Monday after. After the lecture had let out, Cullen and Kaaras had been talking, about the lecture and last Friday’s game mostly.

Kaaras seemed to have a miraculous ability to make any topic seem interesting, so Cullen was perfectly willing to talk to him about literally _anything_ , even _Dungeons and Dragons_.

Which was how he found himself trapped into attending for a second week, when Semet and Dorian joined them on the way to the lunch hall,

“Oh! Are you guys planning something for this Friday?” Semet asked him. Now that he knew she was related to Kaaras, he could see it. They didn’t look as similar to each other as Marian and Garrett had, but there was definitely a family resemblance.  

“Well I’m not sure I’ll be able—” Cullen started, and hesitated at the absolutely crushed expression on Kaaras’ face. _Maker_ , Cullen thought, _that can’t be legal_. He immediately changed tracks, “—able to plan much of anything, seeing how useless I was last week.”

Kaaras’ face lit up again, and Cullen began to resign himself to a weekly session, at least until everything went to shit. Which it almost definitely would. He didn’t understand why it was so hard to say no to Kaaras, but he had a sneaking suspicion that it was related to his earlier issue of ending up in places he didn’t want to go to. Thankfully, Kaaras himself seemed to be entirely unaware of Cullen’s difficulties.

Over lunch, Kaaras and Semet spoke more about their plans for the game, and though Dorian was doing his best to appear uninterested, he kept adding little comments about his own character that very much betrayed his cool demeanor.

Both of the twins packed away a truly astonishing amount of food, so much so that Dorian looked vaguely horrified. Cullen, on the other hand, was reminded of his plan to ask the twins about their fitness plans.

“You're going out for rugby Kaaras? And Semet you're doing football?” He asked them both.

The twins immediately took on a very similar expression, and yet Cullen found that when Kaaras directed it towards him, it made knots appear in his stomach.

“Well,” Semet began, looking remarkably hesitant.

“We were definitely invited to attend the tryouts?” Kaaras ventured. Semet nodded along.

“Yes, we were definitely _invited_.” Semet confirmed.

“Come on you two,” Dorian scoffed, “I’d bet that Bull and Cassandra are _dying_ to recruit you, given how you two are built, it's entirely possible that’s why they agreed to play—” Dorian cut himself off, like he’d said too much. Fortunately, both of the twins were looking slightly embarrassed, and not really paying attention to the second part of what he had said.

“We, we _exercise_ ,” Semet said, shifting uncomfortably in her seat. There was no other word for it. She looked _sheepish_.

“ _Obviously_ ,” Dorian said in exasperation. Cullen couldn’t blame him—the two of them were built like houses.

“But… we were never the most coordinated pair in our homeschool group.” Kaaras finished. He seemed as if it was something that genuinely upset him.

Cullen reached out and placed a hand on his forearm. “I’m sure you’ll be amazing.” he said with a smile.

Kaaras returned it, and Cullen began felt extremely warm. That was until he realized that Dorian had noticed the entire exchange and was now looking at him strangely. He coughed and withdrew his hand.

He stood and used the excuse that was nearly time for anatomy to hopefully distract everyone from what had just happened. Unfortunately, by the time they had all reached the Drakon Building, Dorian had gone from being confused to looking smug, and that _definitely_ was not a good sign.

* * *

The cafeteria was busy, to be sure, but not so much that there weren’t free seats available, even an entire empty table if one was willing to walk halfway across the room. Cassandra was sure, then, that Varric had plenty of _other_ options of seats when he came to join her for lunch.

She was decidedly _unsure_ of how to handle the situation. Beyond a cursory non-verbal greeting, and a glance in his direction, she returned her focus to an anthology of Orlesian poetry, doing her best to ignore the presence in the seat across from her.

“Hello to you too!” Varric said, his tone entirely too amused by _something_.

She grunted in reply, and went back to reading.

They were silent for the next few minutes, but Cassandra simply couldn’t focus entirely on her book, not with him just _sitting there_. The genius behind _The Tale of the Champions_ , objectively the best webcomic ever created, was sitting across from her, and he was so… _annoying_. Much more so than his comments and authors notes had led her to believe, in any case.

Cassandra kept glancing over at him as he ate. At one point, it looked like he was about to say something. But just as he was about to open his mouth, Solas, the physics student from the game last Friday walked over to them and sat down.

Cassandra narrowed her eyes, “Alright, what is this?”

Varric looked up from his meal, which was composed entirely of things that did not fall into any recognizable food group and seemed to be mostly colors that didn’t occur in nature. He noticed the disgusted expression that she had leveled at his food, and smiled at her widely. “What is what, Seeker?” He asked.

“This! Why are the two of you sitting here?” Cassandra replied, losing her patience slightly. She couldn’t be held responsible for how she reacted to Varric, she decided. He seemed to make a game out of getting her to act… strangely.

“My apologies, Cassandra, I merely thought that the two of you were discussing this week’s session, and so I opted to join you. Unless of course there is some ban on invading the table space of the Captain—”

“Relax Chuckles, I was the one that started it, sitting at a public table like some kind of anarchist,” Varric said with an easy grin, “And you can relax too, I have absolutely no ulterior motive in regards to sitting here other than trying to avoid being sat next to by some random person.”

“And so to avoid this, you sit next to a random person?” Cassandra asked, still suspicious.

“Hey! You’re not a random person, we share like four classes! We’ve eaten a meal, **_and_** performed an activity in a group together. We’re **_acquaintances_** , Seeker, whether you like it or not.”

Cassandra was at a loss on how to reply. She settled for a noncommittal noise of acceptance before turning back to her book. Out of the corner of her eye she saw Varric take out his phone and begin texting furiously.

After a brief period of silence, only broken by the clatter of silverware and the sound of Varric’s phone buzzing with replies, Solas looked up from his meal. “Cassandra, why did you choose a paladin? It seems needlessly restrictive, and the same effect could be achieved with a sorcerer and fighter multiclass combination—”

“Maybe because multiclassing only makes sense late game? Or because it fits better with the character archetype and backstory she came up with? Which I might add was very extensive and well thought out?”

Varric had defended her character before Cassandra had been able to respond or justify her choice, _for her_. She didn’t know what to think.

She coughed, and then coughed again, and then realized she had begun to choke on something. The fit of coughing didn’t last long enough for Varric or Solas to be able to do anything to help, but by the end of it Cassandra was so thoroughly embarrassed that she took her books and left the table immediately, without bothering to look back.

* * *

_Tuesday_

Semet looked up from the salad she was tossing. Kaaras was trying to hold his anatomy textbook with only one hand, and trying to drink a protein shake with the other. It wasn’t a very successful attempt.

“Get a straw,” she told her brother, rolling her eyes as she placed the bowl of salad on the table. He’d already set it, and so he made his way over, eyes still glued to his place.

Semet flipped open her chemistry textbook and began to read.

“Shouldn’t you be studying for Forensic Science?” She asked him, mouth full of lettuce.

“Did that already,” he replied, absently trying to stab a tomato with his fork. “Don’t you have accounting next?”

“I’m going to do that after lunch,” she said, turning a page.

“Ah,” Kaaras turned back to his salad. Then he glanced up. “So, have you thought about the game? I know we had to come up with those characters on the spot, but I thought they turned out okay.”

“So do I!” Semet agreed, grinning. “And it seems like a good group!”

“Pretty large,” Kaaras said.

“But they all seem pretty nice,” Semet said, feeling the tips of her ears turn hot as she thought about Josephine.

“Yeah...” Kaaras seemed distracted by something, but Semet decided not to ask.

“So you remember that orb that Varric mentioned?”

“The one that’s clearly a plot item?”

“Want to—?”

“Oh yeah.”

With that, the twins went back to their reading and salads.

* * *

Going to lunch after International Relations was always an affair. Professor Anora usually wanted a word with her—she was the advisor for the Student Council, after all—and then she had to find Vivienne and Blackwall, who were usually happy enough to wait for her outside.

Luckily, Professor Anora only had a few questions that day, so Josephine escaped quickly.

Outside, the air was brisk, and Josephine reached into her bag, where she should have her hat. Instead, her fingers brushed against the soft material of Semet’s scarf.

“Drat!” She said to herself. She must have forgotten to return it. She wrapped it around her neck anyways; it _was_ cold.

“There you are, darling!” Vivienne smiled at her, and Josephine smiled back at her and Blackwall.

“Sorry for keeping you two waiting,” she said, pulling on her gloves.

“No trouble at all,” Blackwall said, offering them both his arms in a show of gallantry that made her laugh. She accepted it, and Vivienne took the other arm.

“Are you enjoying our unit on the Qunari Islands, my dear? Such a fascinating people, are they not?”

“Oh yes!” Josephine said cheerfully. “It’s really quite interesting!”

“Iron Bull is from there, isn’t he?” Blackwall said as they entered the dining hall.

“I believe so,” Vivienne shed her elegant white peacoat and went to stand in line. Josephine and Blackwall followed her.

“I believe Semet said that her parents were from there too,” Josephine said, standing on her toes in order to see the whiteboard with the special written on it.

“Oh really!” There was something in Vivienne’s voice that Josephine couldn’t place. “Perhaps you should ask her about it? I’m sure our dear Semet would be glad to share what she knows with you.”

“Oh, yes! That would make an excellent final project!” Josephine said brightly. She’d figured out what Vivienne was implying and she wasn’t sure if she approved. She’d only just met Semet, after all, and it was bad enough that Leliana had decided she was interested, and had taken to searching Semet out on social media.

“As you say, my dear,” Vivienne said, seeming willing to drop the subject. Josephine was glad.

* * *

_Wednesday_

Vivienne hadn’t been _worried_ exactly, but she had held some reservations about Josephine’s course load at the beginning of the semester.

Normally she enjoyed being right immensely, but this time it came at the cost of seeing her friend worried about having to make up the required science credit that she had ignored in previous years. Vivienne had planned accordingly, making time in her busy schedule that she knew matched with Josephine’s to help her, which was no mean feat; Josephine’s schedule was crowded to the point that she had practically no free time to speak of. She had been ready to go as far as to offer her help formally tutoring her in Chemistry, if only to spare Josephine the perceived indignity of having to go through Student Services to find a tutor.

Apparently, none of that had been necessary. Josephine had gone and found a tutor all on her own, and while Vivienne could have been upset that Josephine was clearly disrespecting the claim she had staked on the freshman and her brother, she noted that Josephine’s interest extended somewhat beyond the scope of academics, and so could excuse the behavior.

When they left their Chemistry lecture on Thursday, Josephine was bemoaning the fact that Semet had been in Val Royeaux of all places for weeks and still hadn’t ventured into town, or eaten anywhere besides her and Kaaras’ apartment, and the cafeteria on campus. While Vivienne did agree that this was a travesty, Josephine’s dramatics seemed to involve quite a bit of touching Semet’s arm. It didn’t escape Vivienne’s notice that Josephine was still wearing the blue scarf, which she knew was Semet’s. Perhaps an oversight, but somehow Vivienne doubted it was a coincidence.

Interested to see where this would go, Vivienne suggested they take Semet out for lunch. Although Semet clearly didn’t like crowds or wandering around strange places, she was perfectly willing to venture out into the city with Vivienne and Josephine’s company.

 _Le Masque du Lion_ was a respectable enough establishment, even if the garish and obviously plastic dragon’s head made it a bit of a tourist trap. It was also, unfortunately, the only cafe in walking distance that made Josephine’s favorite sweets, and so Vivienne found herself here more frequently than her and Bastien’s trainer would like.

“Semet dear,” she said, as the girl stood in the line, having already declared her intention to get some chocolate-based sweets and an espresso. She seemed to be looking hard at the displays of sweets while Josephine had excused herself to the bathroom.

“Yes?” Semet asked, looking up.

“Those yellow ones there are Josephine’s favorites. Just in case you were wondering.” Vivienne said with her best mysterious smile.

Blushing slightly, Semet ordered two of the most extravagant looking lemon squares in existence in addition to a few squares of chocolate fudge and two small truffles. Vivienne contented herself with a drink; she and Bastien had dinner plans that night. By the time Josephine had returned, they had grabbed a table by the window, and were waiting for her to start eating.

Josephine squealed in delight when she saw the plate. “Oh these are my absolute favorites! And they always run out early in the day, thank you!” She sat down and began to devour them in a perfectly dainty way that Vivienne was used to.

Semet mumbled a response while Vivienne looked on.

Vivienne paused in her evaluation of Semet as Josephine’s chemistry tutor. She wondered exactly how much studying the two would get done if they were left alone.

* * *

_Thursday_

Even if Krem didn’t understand why Bull was putting this much effort into scouting a new prop, Bull was glad he was backing him up anyways.

Bull had a _sense_ about people, and that sense was telling him that he needed to get to know Kaaras. Though not in the way certain members of their lunch table wanted to get to know him, Bull thought, eying Cullen with a grin to himself.

Krem was carrying on a mostly one sided conversation with Cullen about some ROTC issue, and the combination of Cullen’s jaw tightening every time Samson’s name was mentioned, and the dazed look Cullen got whenever Kaaras asked a question, Krem was clearly struggling.

“But you know that he’s—” Krem seemed almost upset, and a bit worried, if only for Cullen’s sake. Bull frowned. He’d have to get the full details out of Krem later.

“ _Please_ , not now,” he replied, glancing over at Kaaras, who seemed politely distracted. Cullen practically sighed in relief as Krem let the issue drop. It looked like he was more nervous about Kaaras hearing than he was about whatever it had been.

Normally, it wouldn’t have taken Bull very long at all to piece together Cullen’s attraction, or Kaaras’ reciprocation for that matter, but there was something, off, about it. The way Cullen looked at Kaaras wasn’t the way Krem looked at girls, or the way Bull looked at just about everyone.

Kaaras began to talk about the physiology lecture that he and Cullen had just come from, and how excited he was to implement some new biomechanical principles into his workouts. Bull’s ears perked up. Given how much this guy ate, which was nearly as much as Bull himself, and how much he seemed to enjoy exercise, he was confident that he had found exactly the person they needed to boost their team this year.

“I mean, I’m still not sure, Krem. I mean it when I say I’m no good with sports.” Kaaras said. That was the main issue, Bull thought. Kaaras was just lacking in confidence.

“And I mean it when I say that nobody built like you could be a _bad_ prop! You’ve just gotta stand there, hunker down, and not let anyone push you over!” Bull reassured him. “You just need to boost your confidence, I’m sure Cullen here wouldn’t mind being your cheer squad at tryouts, right?” Bull elbowed Cullen conspiratorially, waggling his eyebrows for extra affect.

Cullen flushed bright red, just as Kaaras yelled, “No! I mean, well—” it was like watching a trainwreck. Cullen was tripping over his words to explain himself but not really saying anything, Kaaras trying to reassure him that no offense was taken but still looking forlorn.

After a minute or so of this, Bull decided to take pity on them. “Oh, would you look at the time, Krem, Kaaras, time for Criminology!” He said, standing rather abruptly, causing the whole table to move.

Krem followed after him and Kaaras did too, after a moment’s pause. They waved goodbye to Cullen, who still had yet to return to his normal color, and headed to the Dales Building, a good few hours early.

* * *

_Friday_

It had been a good week. The bees had really liked the flowers that Vivvy had given her in exchange for recruiting everyone for the Dungeons and Dragons game of hers (although why Vivvy was so determined to get those two particular nerds to join her nerd-squad was beyond Sera), and so Sera was having a fun time trying to train bees to go for bald heads (what? Egg-head had it coming!)

And now, it was time to play the nerd-game again, but Sera found that she was actually looking forward to it. It wasn’t boring, Varric let her do sneaky stuff, and she could pick Cullen’s pocket and no one could get mad at her, because it was a _game_. Brilliant, really. She didn’t know why she hadn’t picked up this geek stuff sooner. It was loads of fun.

But before that, she had to do mythology. Blech. At least the company was interesting.

She sat down behind Bull again, mostly because she liked being able to hide behind him. And she had an excuse for not seeing the board. Plus, she could lean around him and fire spitballs at Dorian if she got bored.

“Are you going to actually pay attention this time, or are you going to finish that cartoon you were making of the professor?” It was hard to tell what Blackwall was doing behind the beard, but Sera was pretty sure that he thought it was funny.

“Finishing the picture, duh,” Sera said. “Besides, all this mythology stuff is boring. Blah blah, gods kill everyone, blah blah, can’t keep his prick in his pants, blah blah, now you’re a cow.”

“I think you forgot the smiting,” he said, but she could definitely see teeth under the beard. He was smiling! Good. She liked Blackwall. He was decent sort.

“Smiting, yeah! All thunder and lightning and _doom_!” She raised her hands into the air, grinning.

“Doom’s my favorite part!” Dagna said. Dagna was all proper and shiny, she was. She was in Sera’s chemistry class, and she had already gotten in trouble four times for mixing things she shouldn’t. Sera liked her already.

“Oh really? I would have thought the lightning would have gotten your attention,” Blackwall said, setting up his notebook. Because he actually took notes. _Ha_. Old students like him were funny. Sera wasn’t sure how old he actually was, but that beard did not just appear, Sera was sure of that.

“You coming tonight, Buttercup?” Varric asked, halfway down to his seat in the front row. He was sitting next to Egg. Which was silly; Varric was actually nice, and didn’t say rude things about Sera’s art, or her grammar, or her hair. So why did he hang out with that piss-bag?

Sera laughed instead of asking, because, “ _Duh_. There’s probably shiny stuff in the spider-corpses! And I still haven’t gotten to use sneak attack! _Twing_!” She mimed shooting a bow.

Varric laughed. “Oh, I’m sure you’ll get a chance, Buttercup. Plenty of things for you to shoot and steal, I promise.”

“ _Yes_ ,” Sera pumped her fist in the air.

“Hell yeah,” Bull offered her a fist to bump, which was awesome, even if Bull’s hands were like, four times the size of normal hands. “We’re going to fuck shit up!”

Sera cheered, much to the displeasure of the professor, who was trying to start class.

Ah well. Not like anyone was actually paying attention to him anyway. Except the twins, ‘cause apparently they were nerds like that.

* * *

_And so the last of the temple doors swing open dramatically, and you see on the pedestal at the end of the long hall before you, the great orb of the Evanuris._

**_-I step towards it._ **

_Alright, Thom Rainier steps forward. The tile you step onto sinks down. Fire bursts from the ceiling and walls. Roll evasion._

**_-I rolled a twelve._ **

**_-Ah, c’mon! There’s always traps! You can’t just not check for traps! That’s the best part!_ **

**_-Noted for the future, Sera. Now let’s find out if I’m going to make a very handsome charred corpse, shall we?_ **

_Not quite! But I do think your hair is on fire. You sustain... let’s make that 3 damage._

**_-I cast cure light wounds on Rainier._ **

_Alright, cleric time! Roll a d4, thank you Nimueh. Let’s see that dice... okay, Rainier! You’re healed up to full, but your hair still smells pretty burned._

**_-Charming, I’m sure._ **

_Absolutely. Now, which of our charming rogues wants to search for traps?_

**_-I can do it._ **

_Alright Cole, that’s a search roll._

**_-I got a seventeen._ **

_What’s the plus you have there? Holy shit, kid. Okay, you see four traps. Do you want to disable them?_

**_-I’ll do it! Disable device!_ **

_Roll then, Buttercup._

**_-Shite. Only eleven. Wait! Plus... two? And another one?_ **

_Let me see the character sheet. Okay, there we go. Remind me to talk this over with you after the game. Anyways, Red Jenny steps forward, and begins to disable the traps._

**_-Is it safe to move on?_ **

_Why don’t you step forward and find out, Curly?_

**_-Leliana?_ **

**_-It’s Lady Nightingale, Stanton, honestly. I search for more traps._ **

_You don’t sense any more traps._

**_-You’re really into this role playing thing, aren’t you?_ **

**_-Shush, just sit there and look pretty._ **

**_-Alright, we move forward._ **

_Alegra leads the way forward. The tunnels seem to be getting wider as you go. Now you can walk four people across. You notice the mysterious murals from earlier are continuing. Strange depictions of odd looking elves with glowing eyes. Half of the elves have strange markings on their faces, half of them do not._

_You draw close to the orb. So Alegra is leading, who else is in the front row?_

**_-That’d be Cullen and I._ **

_Okay, so Hissrad’s shoulder brushes against the wall of the cave. Where you touch it, suddenly there’s a bright, glowing rune._

**_-I detect magic!_ **

**_-Detect magic!_ **

**_-I cast detect magic!_ **

_Calm down, kids. You quickly identify the rune as one that summons a pride demon. Before you, a large circle has begun to glow on the ground. Roll initiative._

_The demon appears, cackling loudly and evilly. He’s covered in lightning, and tall enough to nearly touch the ceiling._

**_-How can you tell the demon’s a he?_ **

_Because I’m the storyteller, kid. Anyways, Madame de Fer, you’re going first._

**_-Charming_ ** _. **I cast ray of frost.**_

_Alright, you cast a ray of white energy, and the demon pauses in his—fine, **its** —tracks, frozen in place by the ice. Sparkler! Your turn. _

**_-Fireball._ **

_Congratulations. You melt the ice, and the demon is free to move. It turns towards you, and screams. Everyone roll will saves._

**_- Shite!_ **

**_-My dear Dorian, what on earth were you thinking? Casting fire so soon after an ice spell, the effects would obviously cancel each other out!_ **

**_-Vivienne, I don’t know if you haven’t noticed, but fire spells are clearly more effective against Pride demons than ice_ ** **_spells._**

**_-Um, Pride demons are lightning based. You want spirit spells._ **

_Listen to Getafix, guys, he knows what he’s doing. Meanwhile. Curly! You’re up next._

**_-I charge forward, and slash at the demon with my sword._ **

_Okay, roll... holy shit._

**_-Is that... good?_ **

_It’s a nat 20, that’s what it is. ‘Is that good?’Andraste’s breath. I can hear Marian crying from here. Roll damage._

**_-What do I roll?_ **

**_-Maker save us all from beginner’s luck._ **

_I intended this to actually be a challenge, sorry Nightingale. Ah well. Stanton charges forward and cleaves the demon in two. It falls apart, slowly crumbling into ash. You look very heroic._

**_-How’s that for looking pretty?_ **

**_-Do not get overconfident, Cullen. We still don’t have the orb. I move towards it._ **

_Alegra steps forward, lifting her torch to cast a light. The mosaics have changed; they’re mostly red now, and seem to portray a tragedy instead of a battle._

**_-Fen’harel! Is it safe to touch?_ **

**_-I move forward and cast detect magic on the orb._ **

**_-Detect magic, really?_ **

**_-Oh, and I suppose you have a better solution, Dorian?_ **

_Focus kids! Geeze, you’re worse than Fenris and Anders. Roll the dice, Chuckles. Wait, what was that noise? Chuckles, did you hit the twins?_

**_-We’re dead._ **

**_-Very dead._ **

**_-Tragically dead._ **

**_-Total party kill on the second day._ **

_Calm down you two, I’m sure it’s not that bad._

**_-Varric. Natural one. _ **

_... Well, shit. Let me check my notes. Fen’harel, you think the orb is safe to pick up._

**_-Shite!_ **

**_-Are you two alright? I didn’t realize that twins actually could communicate without words. _ **

_I’ve seen weirder, trust me Ruffles, the shit Marian and Garrett would get up to—_

**_-We step forward and pick up the orb._ **

_At the same time?_

**_-Yeah._ **

_Alright. Unbeknownst to all of you, Fen’harel’s spell somehow managed to active this ancient elven orb of mysterious purpose. The pedestal it was standing on begins to sink into the ground. The walls begin to shake. The orb begins to glow._

_And then the sky rips open._

“Arsehole!” Sera yelled, and once again, the mood shatters.

“I am hardly to blame for this!” Solas defended himself, hunched slightly over his character sheet.

“You and your... bloody _stupid_ spell!”

“It was the luck of the roll! It could have happened to anybody!”

“Calm down, calm down,” Varric said, although he was clearly unhappy with the situation as well. Well, there went all of his campaign plans. He’d half to redraft. At least Anders had had the courtesy to let them almost finish the plot before fucking everything up.

**Author's Note:**

> Next chapter: Vivienne abandons subtlety, the twins attend real classes for the first time in their lives, and the game begins.


End file.
